And I Cried

I sat in the neurologist’s office late yesterday afternoon, and I cried.  “I can help you,” he had said.  That’s when the tears started.

Maybe it was his kind eyes.

Or maybe it was the countless weekend hours I’ve spent in bed, sleeping off a headache.  Maybe it was all the family parties we’ve had to leave early.  Maybe it was the many “Can you please come over?” phone calls to my mom.  Maybe it was the text messages asking my husband to come home from work early.  Maybe it was the work meetings I’ve facilitated but barely remember because my head hurt. so. bad.  Maybe it was all those moments I’ve had to tell my girls, “Not now, Mommy has a headache” – all those moments I’ve missed.  Maybe it was all those nights I took too much headache medicine and didn’t even care about the consequences.  Maybe it was the time I choked back tears as I taught Maddie how to call my mom for help, just in case.  Maybe it was that evening I finally went out with my friends but had to leave early because the pounding just wouldn’t stop.  Maybe it was the many nights I’ve sat on the edge of my bed while my family slept, wondering if I should go to the hospital.

Maybe it was the way he called me a ‘migraineur,’ as if this ugly condition deserves a fancy name that sounds French.

Maybe it was his kind eyes.  

He said, “I can help you,” and I cried.

8th Annual Slice of Life Story Challenge.  Join at Two Writing Teachers.

8th Annual Slice of Life Story Challenge. Join at Two Writing Teachers.

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30 thoughts on “And I Cried

  1. This is certainly worth crying over! Severe headaches are no small problem. I only get occasional headaches, but both my mom and sister get migraines on a relatively regular basis. My thoughts are with you – and my hopes that you find something to bring relief!

  2. Lovely piece and so happy that somebody can help you with your pain, It must have been so hard knowing that you have missed so much because of something not within your control. Good luck!

  3. My heart really hurts for you, having quite a few friends who suffer from daily, chronic migraines. What hope he spoke into your life; what a miraculous day! Hoping that this all will become a reality for you very soon.

  4. Dana, across the board, your slices reach my heart. Your way with words, your honesty, your bravery of putting it all out there. This slice scared me at first “neurologist”. I was relieved when you wrote how he can help you. My heart was breaking as you unraveled all the other pain these migraines have caused you. He’s going to do more than just help you with the migraine, he’s going to help you eliminate those “maybe it was”. Anything I can do…I’m here.

  5. Migraines are crippling… Hope is an amazing thing when you’ve endured chronic pain. For someone to offer you light, and hope, and health, and peace… that’s a pretty amazing moment. You captured it perfectly.

  6. Your readers cried for you as they felt your relief and hope for a pain free future. Your raw honesty and show of vulnerability was touching. I wish you all the best. Thank you so much for sharing.

  7. My heart goes out to you. I can’t imagine what you’ve been going through. As someone who hates headaches, I would hate to have one all the time. I am so sorry you have had to deal with this. Hope they find answers soon! Sending you positive vibes! 🙂

  8. And he will help you. Migraines are unbearable. I’m lucky enough to only get one a year, but I remember being young and seeing my mom suffer from them on a weekly or monthly basis. I can feel your plea for help in your writing. I hope things get better soon.

  9. Accept the help! I’m so sorry for you and all the pain (physical and emotional) associated with migraines. The tears are allowed! I have had a lot of friends lately going through similar and scary moments of severe headaches. I wonder why? Is there are true cause? Or a multitude of factors? I’m so glad that your doctor can help you. That is good news. Hugs to you Dana.

  10. I hope this doctor with the kind eyes can help you! After all the pain, I don’t blame you a bit for the tears. I hope you will be crying tears of happiness soon.

  11. I want to cry for you Dana. I suffered through migraines from the time I was 12 until my 40s. So many times I just wanted to take my head off. So many times I had to leave work because I knew I wouldn’t be able to drive in another few hours. I was lucky in that with menopause my migraines stopped.I still get headaches but not like those. So glad you found someone who can help!

  12. Let me know what he prescribes, Dana – I suffer from these as well (in fact, just coming off a wild one) and have little to no success with treatments. Loved the feeling with which you wrote this.

  13. The short beginning. The short end. The punch that was packed in the middle! You shared exactly what your pain is – and it’s not just headache pain. It’s just such a relief when someone “in the know” says they can help, isn’t it?

  14. I understand completely and my heart goes out to you, Dana. I am glad he had kind eyes, but mostly, I am glad that he will be able to help you get your life back. I love the way you wrapped this piece up so nicely. Truly a great slice!

  15. So hopeful that he will help, Dana. I find it hard to believe that all these months you have done so very much for everyone, the family, your work, the blog and still have been fighting these headaches. Hugs to you across the way!

  16. Wow. The middle helped me understand your struggle, but the repeated, simple phrases at the beginning and end were what made this post so powerful. The combination of kind eyes and words like “I can help” can be incredible!!!

  17. A toothache is the most chronic pain I have ever had and I can’t even image the misery of constant headaches. Praying that your dr. can help.

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